Tag Archive | growth

My Name is Dorian, but I am also “beautiful.”

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I have been told that I am “beautiful” for a while. I knew what pretty was, but “beautiful”… well, I could not really understand that one. I responded every single time for a while, “I’m not beautiful, I Dorian.” My Mama and Daddy laughed at me, but I was serious. I know who I am… I AM DORIAN.

The other day, though, my sister Adalyn took me upstairs to her room, and she put me in some of her dress clothes that she is too big for now. I tried on dress after dress, and Adalyn called down to my Mama and told her that she couldn’t come up to see what we were doing. Mama usually won’t listen to that one because it can mean trouble, but this time she waited for the surprise.

Then we tried it… the most fancy white dress that looked like a princess dress. It was a teeny bit big on me, but it was just the right one. Adalyn smoothed out my hair and brushed it, and then she put on the finishing touch, blue clip-on earrings that made me just like the princesses that I watch. I felt so very pretty.

When I walked down those stairs, just like a princess would in my fancy shoes and earrings and dress, I felt different. I felt so very grown up and big, but I did not know the word for how I felt.

Then Adalyn said it. She said, “Look Mama, doesn’t Dorian look so beautiful?” My Mama said, “Oh Dorian, you are so very beautiful. You look like a princess.” For the first time, I did not argue back. I knew what it meant, and I was… I was beautiful, just like the flowers outside and the stars in the sky. Beautiful is how you feel. Beautiful is flowers and trees and sunshine and mountains and water. Beautiful is me. I am Dorian, and I am beautiful.

What do you mean, a dandelion is a “weed”? It is the most beautiful of flowers.

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Spring has finally come, and with it are beautiful things in all kinds of colors everywhere. I love seeing all of the bright pinks and whites and yellows and purples that the Earth has this time of year. I stop to see (and smell) all of the flowers. After all, isn’t that what you are supposed to do? I know that it takes longer, but enjoying the world is what us little people do. We are really good at noticing what big people miss sometimes… after all, we are closer to the ground, and we have a better view.

My very favorite flower is the dandelion. My Mama says that is her very favorite too because my Daddy calls her his dandelion, so it is very special for her. Dandelions are “weeds” though so I hear, which is a type of flower that a lot of people want to get rid of. Why they would want to make any flower go away I don’t know, but my Daddy says that they can take over the yard and they can go everywhere with their little blooms, so a lot of people don’t like them because they just want green grass and nothing else in the yard. Doesn’t make sense to me, but big people often don’t make any sense at all, so I just have to go with these things when I don’t understand them.

What those big people don’t understand is that Dandelions are really special flowers because they start as one thing and become another. They start out as little yellow flowers, then that part goes away, and then there are little bitty white fluffy seeds that blow in the wind and make new yellow ones all over the place. This, my Daddy says, is why the are called a weed, because they end up all over the place when the little seeds blow around. There end up being too many, he says. Silly big people… don’t they know that there can never, ever be too many flowers?

I think that my little dandelion friends are beautiful, and I do my part to help them to grow instead of stomping them down. Us little people (and big people who never wanted to grow up like Mama and Daddy) get to grab the white puffballs and blow on them, making their seeds go up in the air into the wind to go to new places to grow. They do this on their own, but I like to think that I am helping nature along to be faster when I spread them around.

I am busy making brand new dandelions, and they are all so very beautiful, just as nature intended them to be. We are all like dandelions if we want to be, beautiful little flowers that are wild and free and can move in the wind.

Time Flies Even for Little People… End of Summer Reflections.

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Summer has come and it has gone, and now it is something called fall. I don’t really remember last fall at all, although my Mama tells me that I had a great time jumping in the leaves and puddles and that I loved when it got colder and when I got to wear my little bear jacket my Daddy ordered me all the way from Japan across the whole world. The bear is a little backpack, and they bought it big so that I can wear it again this year. I have seen it in the closet, and soon, Mama says, he can come out to keep me warm again even when it is cold enough that the water falling becomes white and fluffy snow. Not yet, though, because the beginning of fall can still be hot, and right now the air is sticky and heavy, so the bear jacket will sit and wait for me to be ready for him.

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We had a lot of adventures this summer, and it is now my job to put all of them here so that I can look back and see them when I get bigger and don’t remember anymore. The pictures are there already, but the words need to be too so that we can have something called “memories.” My Mama says that memories are some of the most important things that we can have, because “experiences” in life, and living life to its fullest, make us happy people when we are old and have a lot to look back on. I already have a lot that I have seen, but Mama tells me that life will stretch out and become a big blur of memories and time. Childhood, all of it, she says is like that, and that it seems to last forever but is gone in a blink. A day lasts a long time for me right now, but she says it won’t always be this way. She says it seems like I was born only a moment ago. Ages to me, a second to her.

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So another season passed for me, summer, and that is three of the four for the whole year. I enjoyed everything this summer, but most of all, I enjoyed spending time with my family no matter what we did or where we were adventuring. I already figured out that sometimes the best memories of all involve sitting still and quietly snuggled up to the people that love us and that we love the most.

For me that’s Mama.

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And Daddy.

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And my big sister Addie.

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And my big, big sister Lilli.

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And my giant brother Jonah.

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And I got to snuggle with my Nana and Granny and Grandpa and Mama Linda and Granddaddy Moe and Jennifer too. I got to see and play with them all this summer, everyone’s slow down time, and they got to see me get bigger and bigger. I have love all around me every single day, and my Mama says that makes me one of the luckiest people out there. Love, she says, is the most powerful thing on Earth.

So goodbye summer, goodbye t-shirts and shorts, goodbye scraped up knees and bug bites, goodbye pools and hot sweaty arms, goodbye crickets and light-up bugs. I’ll see you next year, and I’ll be ready and even stronger when you get back.

Where Oh Where Has Dorian Been?

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I have been MIA in the blogging world– for an entire month– which for me is ages and ages and ages. I have been quite busy and so have Mama and Daddy, and they haven’t really been able to help me with getting all of the words out that I want to say. I can’t do it on my own yet, especially since all of the words that I want to write are in my head and my fingers are too little to get them out, plus I don’t know the thing that Mama calls spelling since I am busy learning the letters that makes the words.

What has kept Mama so busy is that she has been looking for a new job, and she was told today that she is going to be working for a new university teaching from home, so now she is getting “back to life.” What Mama doesn’t know is that life is always there, she just had to put helping me write on hold for a little bit. That’s okay, Mama, I can be patient… sometimes. All that I know is that I am happy that my Mama can be around me even more than she always has been. After all, I am not a fan of her going away to “work.” Work can be right here at home now, Mama, or wherever we are.

My Mama promised, though, that now we can get back to writing out all of my adventures and how I am getting bigger, bigger, bigger. In the past month I have learned new words, I can say a lot of sentences, and I can tell her more and more and more about what I want and need. This sometimes means shout talking, and we are working on my quiet inside voice. I am not good at that yet. I can now go up the steps without holding on or help like a big person, and I can run faster too. I am in the stage that Mama and Daddy call the “terrible twos,” which means that I am sometimes a bit too demanding and that I can get my angry face really fast when things don’t go my way. Everything is mine, it’s all Dorian’s, all for the taking. That’s not so terrible, though, Mama and Daddy. I’ll figure it out. It’s all new, and I just want a piece of all of the things, that’s all. I will learn, because you will teach me, patience and kindness and understanding. I know love already, and I tell you that I love you all of the time, and I have learned “kisses.” I give love in my own way, and I am just making my own space in the world.

So where has Dorian been? A bit of everywhere, doing a bit of everything, and loving every minute of it.

Dorian Dean, Expert Hiker in the Making.

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Look at me, I am up in the air in my happy little hiking backpack. I get to sit on Mama or Daddy’s back and I even have a little place for my feet while they go do this thing called “hiking” things in pretty places.

I love my little pack, which is made just for little people like me, because I can see the world from up where my Mama and my Daddy are. Everything looks different from up here, and everything is a little less gigantic. I wish I could be up this high all the time so I could see more, but Mama says not to hurry to grow taller because she wants me just my size right now and wishes she could keep me that little. I know you don’t want me hurrying up, Mama, but the view sure is fantastic, so I can’t help it.

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I love being outside in the sun, the water, and the trees… any part of the wonderful outside part of the Earth, so this is my new favorite spot to be. After all, a place where I can hug onto my Mama and Daddy’s back while getting warm in the sunshine? I just don’t think that you can get much better.

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Baby New Year’s Resolutions

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Mama and Daddy have told me that it is a brand new year now and that this one is called “2015.” They have seen a lot of these new years because they are very, very old people, but since I am brand new, this is only the second one that I have seen. I tried to make it until midnight like my big sister Addie did this year, but I am so, so little, so I only made it until 9:30. Since I usually go to bed at 8, though, I think that I did pretty well for a little person. Mama and Daddy and Addie kissed me early when they were putting me to bed so that I got New Year’s kisses, too.

Every time this change happens, in a way, everything is new again. That means that it can be a time for new starts or changes for a lot of people and that what they want to do to change is called a “resolution.” Change happens all of the time, after all, I change every day a little bit, but this is a way to make people focus on the things that they have been thinking about doing but haven’t done yet. Apparently when people get old, they sometimes wait to change things instead of just doing the new things like I do. I learned to climb on the big table for example the other day, and I didn’t have to wait for anything except for my legs to get strong enough. Big people are already strong enough to do most anything, so I am not sure why they wait for so long to do what they want to do, but Mama told me that they get “stuck in their ways” and have to get “kicked in the butt a bit” to make new things happen sometimes.

Mama and Daddy have called this year the “Year of Us,” meaning that they will focus on their lives together this year and that they will go on more adventures together. They said that they are going to focus on making their lives closer and closer knit. Since they hardly go away from one another, I don’t know exactly what they mean, but I know that it is good that they want to make an even tighter hug than they already have with one another (as long as I can snuggle right in the middle when I want to, too).

What Mama and Daddy don’t know is that I can also have these “resolutions.” I may not have that much experience, but I can change, and I know that I need to focus on myself, too. After all, I am growing up and fast, so I came up with a list of resolutions that I want to do this year.

1. Share better. I have an “everything is mine” philosophy right now, but it seems to make people upset for some reason when I take things from their hands while they are using them. I will work on only taking the things that I really, really want instead.
2. .. . . . .boogcjij Stop stealing Mama’s computer when she is trying to work or to type for me on my little blog. As you can see, I am not doing well on this resolution so far. That was me… stealing Mama’s computer. I was just adding my own little touch.
3. Use my words. Mama and Daddy say this to me when I start pointing and yelling at the things that I want to get. I have a lot of them in my head, but they just come out instead as other sounds. I will work to get those words out right more often.
4. Make bigger messes. I am really good at this already, but I am always trying to reach new heights in my abilities. I’m like a little baby hurricane, Mama says, but I can always get better.
5. Hug more. I am good at showing love, but Mama and Daddy both seem to melt when I hug them tight like I do with my stuffed animals. I want to make Mama and Daddy happy, so I will work on my hugging arms this year.
6. Climb higher. This one makes both Mama and Daddy nervous, but I am working on my climbing, and I am getting pretty good. I already can get onto the big dining room chairs and onto the dining room table. I see that there are other things that are even higher from there, so I am going to work to get to those things.
7. Run faster. I can walk now, and I can even run when I try really hard, but I want to outrun Daddy. He’s pretty fast and his legs are way longer, so I am not sure how I am going to do with this resolution yet. Watch out, though, Daddy, because I am coming for you.
8. Begin to think about using that potty machine. I pee and poop on myself, and Mama and Daddy have to clean it all up when I do. I see that they use the magic potty machine and I know how to flush that machine, I’m just not quite big enough to know how it works yet. I sit on it with the lid closed, and Mama and Daddy think that I think it’s just a chair, but I know what it’s for.
9. Learn patience. I am not good at this one yet, and even when food is happening really quick, I want it right when my tummy rumbles that it needs food. I am going to work on a 5-minute patience time. That’s enough for a home-cooked meal, right?
10. Learn about me. This one is easy, and I do it every single day. I learn more about who I am and what I am becoming all the time… all that I have to do is to breathe in and out, and experience the wonder that is me in this world.

That’s it. I sure hope that I can do all of these things and lots more, too. Who knows what the year will bring, all that I know is that I am getting bigger in it and becoming my own little person more and more. Happy New Year, everybody, and I hope that you get all of the dreams that you have this year.

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